Movie Review: LAVENDER – weary, and all too familiar, story about a haunted house and ghosts seeking justice.

You ever watch one of those movies that just feels like it never gets going?  That by the time you’re at the end, it still feels like that?  It’s the cumulative effect of the wrong people doing the wrong things at the same time.  By that, I’m not referring to the actors, who are the least at fault in most productions.  The ones to blame are those on the other side of the camera.  In this case, I’m talking about the mild supernatural drama Lavender, starring Abbie Cornish, Dermot Mulroney, and Justin Long.

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Movie Review: LIGHTS OUT – another vengeful female ghost movie, with an interesting premise undone by lack of scares.

lights-out-poster-image

What is it with Hollywood’s propensity to use the “evil/vengeful female ghost” archetype?  Offhand I can think of Mama, Crimson Peak, both Conjuring movies (technically, the nun in The Conjuring 2 isn’t a ghost, I know), The Woman In Black, The Grudge, etc.  There are male ghosts in movies too, but if you bet on the gender of the spirit in any upcoming ghost-themed horror movie, you’d get long odds on male.  Such is the case with Lights Out, a movie that promises a lot more than it actually delivers.

Continue reading “Movie Review: LIGHTS OUT – another vengeful female ghost movie, with an interesting premise undone by lack of scares.”

Movie Review: GHOSTBUSTERS (2016) – dumb and unfunny, this reboot doesn’t deserve the fanboy rage, or your time.

ghostbusters

Hands up who remembers the tidal wave of vitriol that greeted Paul Feig’s announcement that he was going to reboot Ghostbusters with an all female cast?  C’mon now, it was only two years ago.  I remember it quite well because of the perniciousness of the hatred.  It’s hard to write a review of Feig’s movie without mentioning that phenomenon.  It’s well documented if you feel like checking it out.  I don’t want to speak too much of it, but it reminded me of the same brave souls who took to the internet to issue death threats against critics who slammed The Dark Knight Rises – a movie that deserved all of the criticism that came its way.  On a personal level, I recall being in a crowded theater when Benedict Cumberbatch’s character was revealed to be Khan during Star Trek: Into Darkness, and a guy who was old enough to know better loudly exclaiming his displeasure with some expletives.

Continue reading “Movie Review: GHOSTBUSTERS (2016) – dumb and unfunny, this reboot doesn’t deserve the fanboy rage, or your time.”

Movie Review: THE BOY

boy

The Boy, starring Lauren Cohan (The Walking Dead’s Maggie) is a rickety movie built upon a tottering premise that completely self destructs in Act 3 … but I won’t lie, for the most part, I enjoyed it.  Cohan plays a young American woman who applies for the job of nanny to the child of an elderly couple – trouble is, they live alone in a Gothic castle that looks straight out of The Woman in Black … and their child is … a doll with a porcelain head.  Continue reading “Movie Review: THE BOY”

Movie Review: THE HOUSE ON PINE STREET

House in Pine Street

I admit, I gave up watching Ben Wheatley’s A Field In England about half an hour in (I’ll return to it, though), but because I still wanted to watch a movie, I went with The House On Pine Street, a 2015 independent horror movie summarized as “a woman with an unwanted pregnancy moves into a haunted house”.  Seemed pretty decent from that brief logline.  And that’s pretty much how I would rate it. Continue reading “Movie Review: THE HOUSE ON PINE STREET”

Movie Review: CRIMSON PEAK – Del Toro’s Gothic tale unconvincingly lightweight, overly reliant on CGI.

Crimson Peak

I always approach Guillermo Del Toro’s movies with some hesitation. In my opinion he’s made two absolutely terrific movies in The Devil’s Backbone and Pan’s Labyrinth, but he’s also made mediocre fare like Mimic and Hellboy, and flat out garbage like Pacific Rim and Hellboy 2. The trailers for Crimson Peak didn’t exactly set my heart fluttering either. A lot of greenscreen CGI work in a haunted house movie is an almost guarantee of bullshit, and then there’s Tom Hiddleston.
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